Talking to your teenager

Want to talk with your teen? Break through that hormonal veneer? I think I have found the key: homework.

I can't tell you how many heart-to-heart and how many not so heart-to-heart discussions have resulted from the request, "Mom can you help me with this?" It starts with quizzing for Spanish, health, science, or general help with math and moves on to life. It's the perfect open door into their lives. I love it. And I've relearned, and in some cases, learned so much in the process. For example, during the section on Islam we had more than one discussion about our own religion and God. Spanish test review sessions always result is groans over my total lack of pronounciation. Of course, that's good. It let's her know I don't have all the answers. Science is lovely. Lately the topic of conversation is covalent, and ionic bonding. While running errands we had a wonderful conversation that lasted well into the night, with drawings on how and why different atoms share their electrons. But my favorite subject is math. I can count on at least one request everyday for help. And it's not do this for me. It's a truly help me with this, and don't give me the answer.

Two days ago, we spent an hour looking at the problem. I could solve it the old tried and true college way -- but couldn't set it up within the framework of Algebra I. We called in the big guns. Problem solved. And yesterday, while having friends over for a Game Day she asked me for help later. I said, "Ask the boys. They can help you." After all they are in high school and college. It was nice to see them all huddled over a book. I didn't mind sharing the fun. With a quiz today, I knew there would be more than enough to go around. And there was. After the guests had left, the book was brought out again. She sat on one side of the dining room table working away and I was at the other knitting. Just waiting to respond for a request for assistance.

But I tend to take it overboard. It is my nature. Last Friday, at pickup, she wasn't in the car five minutes when I asked, "Got any math homework?"

Her reply, "Mom, you're weird."

My reply, "Yeah, I know." It's always nice to reminded just where I fit in.