Reality

My sidekick won't be back today. She's back to preschool, and I'm returning to reality. No more fun and games. It's raking the lawn with vigor, and cleaning with a vengeance. When my own were younger, I can remember the cuddling, the cozying, giving them a crazy name for a day, reciting the ABCs with the occasional chicken throw in. But I also remember wishing they were older, and lamenting, "Oh, when your older, you'll be able to buckle you seat belt, and I won't have to carry you across long parking lots." It's only been a few short years, and still yesterday, I joyfully picked up my friend and sang silly songs as we, crossed the great black sea before our beloved bookstore. I buckled her seat belt, not making a big scene about at her age, after all we had the little shelf and cup holder pulled out so she had a place for her lunch.

Last night, I went hear ANTHONY E. WOLF, PhD, best-selling author of: "Get Out of My Life, but first could you drive me and Cheryl to the mall?" talk about what else, teenagers. It was humorous, as everyone in the audience thought he had been living with them, writing down each and every not so humorous at the time, hair pulling, incident. He shared that his children were just like our own, and that there is hope and a light that shine down upon you at the end of the high school tunnel... or sometime around there. I learned my lovelies are normal, and I am not alone with my alien child replacements.

My take home lessons were:

1. Cozy your children. Even in high school, they need it, and deep down inside, want it. Actually, I had noticed that with my teen. A quick brush of a kiss to her cheek is all I can get, but each day, it does us both wonders.

2. After making a decision, disengage from further discussion. This act sets the limit, and lets them know that your mind is made up. I noticed Dr. Wolfe did this with the audience at the end of his talk, giving us a good technical example of how to pull this off.

I walked out almost patting myself on the back about that one. For that is one technique that we have been using at home. After the decision is made, and if it's not popular, we do get some begging and whining. But we have a guideline where we say, "The answer is still no, and if you want me to say yes about (whatever in the future) then stop."